Cross-cultural issues

All relationships are to some extent cross-cultural, as both parties come together from different families to build a new one together. Whilst for many couples this will be a natural set of compromises to which both partners will adjust naturally overtime – for others, the differences can be fundamental- with people finding it difficult to understand the other way of looking at the world.

Cross-cultural issues faced by couples include:

loss of identity
conflicts over differences in fundamental beliefs
clashes in parenting tactics
struggles with unsupportive families
different interpretations of an event relating to some aspect of differing cultures

Some lifestyle disagreements include:

Eating and drinking – Different cultures have different views on alcohol consumption and diets vary greatly around the world.
Clothing – Sometimes people change what they wear to fit in with another culture.
Chore distribution – Different views on gender roles can spark conflict when it comes to distributing domestic chores.
Money- Money can be a big stumbling block when it comes to relationship harmony. How people deal with money, how they value money, and how they spend it can be quite dependent on the culture they come from.

These problems don’t just arise in couples, but also can happen within a family or friendship as we all are unique in some degree, being of different religions, generations, countries etc. Transcultural counselling can help greatly.

Transcultural counselling

Transcultural Counselling is not about being an expert on any given culture, rather it is a way of thinking about patients that acknowledges and values culture. Transcultural counselling aims to provide a service and focus attention on aspects of the counselling process which can easily be overlooked as we strive to improve the ways in which we deliver counselling to individuals for their complex concerns and issues to all the cultural groups we seek to serve.

“The diversity found across cultures signifies the importance of adopting a counselling care system which is sensitive to this diversity and predisposed to incorporating a high-quality service provision reframed to fit the needs of different cultures and values; whether individualistic or collectivistic, and adept at finding solutions which are in conjunction with the clients highly regarded values and traditions to facilitate therapeutic changes. In my work with couples and families navigating cross‑cultural dynamics, I pay close attention to the stories, values, and traditions each person carries with them. Culture shapes how we express care, how we manage conflict, and what we hope for in our relationships, and these differences can sometimes create misunderstandings or feelings of distance. I offer a space where partners and family members can explore these influences with curiosity rather than judgement, making room for each person’s experience to be honoured. Together, we look for ways of relating that respect cultural identities while strengthening connection and shared meaning.” Noah Solarin, Systemic Psychotherapist, Family Therapist, Couple and Relationship Counsellor>